Eggs Florentine

This post might as well be called “sometimes I like to eat two sticks of butter and five eggs.” I was a little cocky, though. My eggs florentine was just too rich to finish. I’ve been wanting to try making this dish since I first made eggs benedict at the beginning of my restaurant-less adventure, and I finally had the spinach and cream on hand to do so. I don’t think I could have possibly packed any more fat or protein on one plate, but since this is AMERICA, I don’t feel bad. Just look at how beautiful this plate is:

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In an attempt to fill my body with the fat and protein it desperately needs after three hard days of dancing, working, and partying, I figured it was about time, and oh boy does making anything with hollandaise take time and both hands. I started by creaming the spinach — about a big cup of torn and fresh big leaves (not the kind from the bag), 3-4 tbsp heavy cream, 2 tbsp butter, and a pinch each of salt/pepper/nutmeg over medium heat until the leaves were just wilted. Each step in the process takes both hands and I still can’t multitask like I usually do while making these things.

Next, I started in on the hollandaise — my least favorite, most tedious thing so far to cook — and repeated the process I used before. After switching off the low heat to let the sauce thicken, I stuck some tomato slices under the broiler for about ten minutes while I started to boil about an inch and a half of water at the bottom of a saucepan. As it boiled, I turned down the heat to simmer, and buttered the slots of this nifty egg poacher. I cracked the eggs into the slots, and dropped the whole thing in to poach for about five minutes or so until the the whites were firm and the yolks were wobbly and still runny.

I turned the heat up and down over and over attempting to keep the simmer going without boiling, which was tricky and time-consuming. Once the eggs were finished, I ended up dropping them both into the shallow water as I tried to lift the tray from the saucepan, but luckily, neither of the yolks cracked open through the whites. I toasted a gluten-free English muffin, and started assembling. As I started topping the tomatoes with the creamed spinach, I realized I hadn’t made quite enough. Plus, the spinach was now cold and the hollandaise was headed that way. Because both have cream and butter and are very sensitive to heat, I hadn’t left the heat on while I’d cooked the rest. I had to reheat the spinach on the stove, but I still wish I’d doubled or tripled the amount of spinach I’d used, added an extra tablespoon of both butter and cream, and an extra pinch of nutmeg (which turned out to be fantastic with the spinach!).

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Over the top, I chopped green onions and topped with some paprika and pepper. It was absolutely as fabulous as it looks on a really snowy night. I’m stuck at home after being blown off and totally unable to work, and animal crackers and eggs florentine were exactly what I wanted to binge-eat on my recovery day. One pro tip, though? Don’t put your animal crackers near your hollandaise. The flavors don’t mix well.

I’m off to get more animal crackers.

Pumpkin alfredo, caprese, peanut butter cookies

After a terrifying brush with death in a blizzard yesterday, I was understandably interested in some comfort food. I was on my way back from my road trip, and I knew some snow was coming. Being a hearty, life-long Midwesterner, I brushed the meteorological reports off as getting some snow and unnecessary panic. Those of us who have lived through many cold, snowy winters shrug at the snow reports. Winter. That’s just winter. Anyway, I slid past a 20-car pile-up without hitting anything, barely, and continued on my way — to the grocery store. Again. I have a feeling I’ll have to find a second home at the grocery store this year, as real food spoils fast.

I’ve made this recipe for pumpkin fettuccine alfredo before, and remembered just how simple and quickly the comfort food hit my table. What I should have done was follow the recipe, but instead, I forgot the parmesan and the sage at the store and wandered around there like a blind moron during a “snowpocalypse” grocery store run. I miss autumn.

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Sometimes, the mistakes are a part of the learning process, right? Well, I was hell-bent on making the pumpkin alfredo after I’d dumped my heavy cream and pumpkin into the saucepan, so I went ahead with it. When I realized I’d forgotten the parmesan cheese, I dumped the leftover ricotta in the sauce, thereby giving it what little cheese flavor that ricotta does have. This is definitely a dish that needs an earthy, salty, hard, punch-y cheese. I figured I’d add some protein and use the ground turkey I’d made on the first before I had to throw it out, and tossed that in the sauce. I didn’t toss in the garlic, or follow the recipe much at all. I was living outside the box! Making it up! And feeling awfully cocky after some cooking success in the previous days.

I dumped in salt, too much thyme because it came out of the jar too fast, not enough oregano, black pepper, and ground sage to save the earthy flavor a little. Ground sage, pals, is nothing like the real thing. In a separate pan, I sauteed mushrooms, broccoli, and garlic in butter. I added those to top it off.

Honestly? Follow that recipe link above. It’s great, it’s fast, and it’s so easy. I had much better luck with it before. If it were me, I’d even grate the parmesan fresh off the block instead of buying packaged shaved pieces, like I’m always tempted to do instead of cleaning a cheese grater by hand. To really go for the gold on this one, use organic pureed pumpkin if you can find it (better flavor), or cook and puree your own and add a little more pumpkin than cream — maybe a cup and a third instead of just one cup.

On the side, I made a favorite: caprese salad. Caprese is only about as hard as chopping the things you need: fresh mozzarella slices, a big tomato, fresh basil, and balsamic vinegar salad dressing. When I’m feeling frisky, I even add pickled red onions, which I could eat all day straight from the jar I pickle them in.

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After screwing up and eating my mistake (which wasn’t that bad, it just lacked in the amount of flavor I expected and loved from it before), I had to shovel the driveway. I hate shoveling. I really, really fucking hate shoveling. I have two herniated discs in my back, and wonky hip ligaments that like to throw me for a loop once in awhile. After coming inside, I thought I’d make some cookies for the kids next door, since they helped and did a great job. I casually flipped through a Better Homes and Gardens special Gluten-Free magazine issue that my mother gave to me, and out of nowhere appeared this recipe:

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I mean, how much easier could a cookie recipe be? It didn’t even include any fancy flours I don’t have, and I happened to have all of the ingredients on hand. I chose to roll mine in sugar at the end, as the recipe suggests, but instead of using parchment paper (who has parchment paper laying around?) I just slid a tiny bit of olive oil around a nonstick cookie sheet. A few notes for the cooking challenged like me, though: by “set in the center” they actually mean, “bake for 11-12 minutes and take the fragile things out of the oven, duh.” I carefully tried not to break them as I transferred them to a cool plate (who has wire racks?), and let them harden. They were great while they were still warm, and worth reheating in the microwave the next morning for a lazy snack in bed.

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